Blogs are for stating and making opinions.
Well, in my opinion, we live in a society where parents are inclined to make excuses for their children.
Little Suzy didn’t nap, so I’m sorry she just wrecked your house and tried to ride your poodle like a pony.
Little Johnny is active and spirited, a better teacher would be able to keep him focused in class.
Priscilla is quiet and intellectual, she does not enjoy interacting with other kids her age.
Gordon likes to be in control and enjoys keeping his possessions to himself.
Tim’s school is having a difficult time engaging him, so he isn’t passionate about his homework.
Judy is stressed, she had mono, and needs a break from her current course load.
While there could be some truth to all of the above statements, I believe that parents don’t like admitting the truth; Suzy is a brat, Johnny is wild, Priscilla has an attitude, Gordon doesn’t share, Tim is lazy, and Judy isn’t ready for an advanced course load.
Why, as parents, do we feel compelled to make excuses for our children? Are we trying to protect them? But are we really protecting them, or are we turning an eye to their shortcomings, rather than confronting them? Are we in denial? Is it easier to believe it is everyone else’s fault?
My children have faults and they make mistakes. I have made a conscientious effort to NOT excuse away their behaviors! Don’t get me wrong, there is a time and place to be sensitive and show compassion to our children. But…if someone is being loud and whiny, it’s not because she didn’t nap, it’s because that is what she does to get my attention. If someone is incessantly talking in class, it’s not the teacher’s fault. If someone insists on having a meltdown at a family event because her cupcake is a different color, it’s not because she’s spirited, or passionate, or even strong-willed…it’s because she is being completely irrational, and needs to learn that you don’t always get what you want in life.
I realize my approach might make some parents uncomfortable, but trust me, when you stop making excuses and start being honest with yourself, and others, you will feel liberated and your children will benefit from the honesty!
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