I always try to live my life without regret and look back on challenges as lessons learned, but when I look back on my time as a stay-at-home mom I instantly feel some regret; regret that I never took advantage of my situation. Instead I lived most days feeling overwhelmed, searching for things to do.
As a new mom, I felt like I had no idea what I was doing. I was fearful, anxious and worried often. Soon after discovering the concept of a “baby schedule”, I found a daily pattern that worked for my son, and I stuck to it, more like, held on to it for dear life.
I was often afraid of the unknown: What would happen if we missed nap time? What would happen if I was out for too long and didn’t have enough ____________ for the baby? What if I needed to breastfeed and couldn’t find a comfortable place to do so? What if, what if, what if. What I didn’t know then, was that my time as a stay-at-home mom was temporary. What I should have said then, was forget the what ifs, we are going to do it all.
Ultimately, the absolute biggest regret I have about my time as a stay-at-home mom, was that I did not travel more with my son. All of my family and many friends live in Connecticut, a short two and a half hour flight from Miami. What I didn’t know then, was travelling with a small baby is pretty easy (compared to a toddler). When we took Landon to CT at 3 months, he slept the entire ride sweetly snuggled in my arms; the same was true when we went at 15 months. What I didn’t know then, was I would eventually go back to work and my vacation days would be limited and monitored. I really wish we traveled more so I could have enjoyed time with friends and family who I know would have helped me get over all my fears.
Recently, when I found out Landon’s school is closing for 2 weeks in August, I knew exactly what I had to do. I booked a flight for the two of us to fly to Connecticut. I have to admit, I am still totally worried about travelling alone with him. How am I going to carry all of our stuff and watch him? What if he cries the whole time? What if he won’t sit still? What if I can’t install the carseat on the plane? What if our flight is delayed? What if he won’t nap? What if he poops on the plane? What if, what if, what if.
But as I said earlier, forget the what ifs….in the absence of fear, I will be brave and travel alone with a toddler. Wish us luck : )
*Above image found on Pinterest.com